Comments on: On Easter: the death and resurrection of the ego http://wellbeingandhealth.net/spirituality/on-easter-the-death-and-resurrection-of-the-ego/ All aspects of wellbeing and health Wed, 11 Jan 2012 21:39:06 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0 By: Evan http://wellbeingandhealth.net/spirituality/on-easter-the-death-and-resurrection-of-the-ego/comment-page-1/#comment-669 Evan Sat, 22 Mar 2008 01:52:10 +0000 http://wellbeingandhealth.net/spirituality/on-easter-the-death-and-resurrection-of-the-ego/#comment-669 Thanks Robert, I think talking about dependence and independence captures the difference nicely. Thanks for your contribution. Thanks Robert,

I think talking about dependence and independence captures the difference nicely.

Thanks for your contribution.

]]> By: Robert | reason4smile http://wellbeingandhealth.net/spirituality/on-easter-the-death-and-resurrection-of-the-ego/comment-page-1/#comment-668 Robert | reason4smile Sat, 22 Mar 2008 01:22:37 +0000 http://wellbeingandhealth.net/spirituality/on-easter-the-death-and-resurrection-of-the-ego/#comment-668 On Cathy's comment on self-sufficiency: I think that's the difference between dependency and interdependency. Dependency is saying that you need to rely on each others.. Interdependency is saying that you need to learn from each others.. Dr. Henry Cloud in his book, Changes That Heal, shared a very interesting point, when we become an adult, we are no longer see others as a person to rely upon, but to learn from. Just an additional thought. And btw, Evan, this is a great reflection on Easter... Thanks for sharing this!!! Happy Easter! Robert On Cathy’s comment on self-sufficiency:
I think that’s the difference between dependency and interdependency.
Dependency is saying that you need to rely on each others..
Interdependency is saying that you need to learn from each others..

Dr. Henry Cloud in his book, Changes That Heal, shared a very interesting point, when we become an adult, we are no longer see others as a person to rely upon, but to learn from.

Just an additional thought. And btw, Evan, this is a great reflection on Easter… Thanks for sharing this!!!

Happy Easter!
Robert

]]> By: Evan http://wellbeingandhealth.net/spirituality/on-easter-the-death-and-resurrection-of-the-ego/comment-page-1/#comment-667 Evan Fri, 21 Mar 2008 23:11:54 +0000 http://wellbeingandhealth.net/spirituality/on-easter-the-death-and-resurrection-of-the-ego/#comment-667 Thanks Char, I think it does help us to see what we are mourning. For me, seeing my ego at work has helped me process my 'stuff' more satisfactorily. Being willing to help does mean that we lay ourselves open to being taken advantage of. I hasten to say that, for me at least, this has been rare. Most people I have found treat me with respect. Thanks for taking the time to comment. Thanks Char,

I think it does help us to see what we are mourning. For me, seeing my ego at work has helped me process my ‘stuff’ more satisfactorily.

Being willing to help does mean that we lay ourselves open to being taken advantage of. I hasten to say that, for me at least, this has been rare. Most people I have found treat me with respect.

Thanks for taking the time to comment.

]]> By: Evan http://wellbeingandhealth.net/spirituality/on-easter-the-death-and-resurrection-of-the-ego/comment-page-1/#comment-666 Evan Fri, 21 Mar 2008 23:06:42 +0000 http://wellbeingandhealth.net/spirituality/on-easter-the-death-and-resurrection-of-the-ego/#comment-666 Hi Cathy, I have no problems with your understanding of self-sufficiency. Thanks for taking the time to comment. Hi Cathy,

I have no problems with your understanding of self-sufficiency.

Thanks for taking the time to comment.

]]> By: char http://wellbeingandhealth.net/spirituality/on-easter-the-death-and-resurrection-of-the-ego/comment-page-1/#comment-665 char Fri, 21 Mar 2008 21:13:59 +0000 http://wellbeingandhealth.net/spirituality/on-easter-the-death-and-resurrection-of-the-ego/#comment-665 really like your post evan~ if one is not buddhist the ego tends to be forgot nowadays in self-reflection. for a while i thought "giving up ego" meant "giving up caring" and that this was how to be non-attached. i got started by cutting up all my cds (i was 24), i missed them after 10 seconds...:-( recently i lost everything off my computer for the last 5 years (e-books coming together, masses of content writing, lesson plans blah blah). as the sensation of loss washed over me i realised that waht really cut was the "time and effort" of "all this stuff that i had". i was mourning for my ego. once i saw things this way i dealt with it really well-friends and family very surprised. and me. i can see how my observation of my ego (as objective as i can be given that i'm human :-) has seperated me from others in fundamental ways (especially female-male realtionships and now am unable to work in a beuracratic workplace). however, the depth of my friendships with a few close to me has been enriched (mostly with women and my family). i have a "self-sufficient" person living with me at the mo. i opened my home to her and her family as they were destititute. the temporary arrangement is now at 2 months and i have asked them to move on in the next two weeks (if you can afford takeaways regularly, home decorations and going to the movies you can afford bond). my housemate bags me for calling on friends and family for aid (as they do me). she conveniently forgets that she is using most of my houselhold items, i am covering the cost of household essentials and only charging her the minimum rent to keep the roof over both our heads. we are social creatures, and community requires lending a hand and being there for others, even when they don't know you are there. asking and accepting help from others keeps me humble, and makes me responsible for putting them first to pay them back or when they need a hand. really like your post evan~ if one is not buddhist the ego tends to be forgot nowadays in self-reflection.

for a while i thought “giving up ego” meant “giving up caring” and that this was how to be non-attached. i got started by cutting up all my cds (i was 24), i missed them after 10 seconds…:-(

recently i lost everything off my computer for the last 5 years (e-books coming together, masses of content writing, lesson plans blah blah). as the sensation of loss washed over me i realised that waht really cut was the “time and effort” of “all this stuff that i had”. i was mourning for my ego. once i saw things this way i dealt with it really well-friends and family very surprised. and me.

i can see how my observation of my ego (as objective as i can be given that i’m human :-) has seperated me from others in fundamental ways (especially female-male realtionships and now am unable to work in a beuracratic workplace). however, the depth of my friendships with a few close to me has been enriched (mostly with women and my family).

i have a “self-sufficient” person living with me at the mo. i opened my home to her and her family as they were destititute. the temporary arrangement is now at 2 months and i have asked them to move on in the next two weeks (if you can afford takeaways regularly, home decorations and going to the movies you can afford bond).

my housemate bags me for calling on friends and family for aid (as they do me). she conveniently forgets that she is using most of my houselhold items, i am covering the cost of household essentials and only charging her the minimum rent to keep the roof over both our heads.

we are social creatures, and community requires lending a hand and being there for others, even when they don’t know you are there. asking and accepting help from others keeps me humble, and makes me responsible for putting them first to pay them back or when they need a hand.

]]> By: Cathy http://wellbeingandhealth.net/spirituality/on-easter-the-death-and-resurrection-of-the-ego/comment-page-1/#comment-663 Cathy Fri, 21 Mar 2008 18:05:58 +0000 http://wellbeingandhealth.net/spirituality/on-easter-the-death-and-resurrection-of-the-ego/#comment-663 Evan, I respectfully disagree with your definition of self-sufficientcy. I believe self-sufficiency means you don't need to be a burden to others. In the work place this means you don't have to constantly be told what to do, and managers know you can do your work with out being watched all the time. In terms of finances, this means you have sufficient income not to need government assistance, the good nature of friends and family, or extensive loans. In your personal life this means you have an identity that makes you secure with your own self. You don't need the input of others to make you feel good; it helps, but it's not a requirement. I see self sufficiency as self confidence and the ability to take care of yourself without "mooching" off of someone else. This doesn't mean at all that you don't "need to relate to anyone else," but that you don't need to *rely* on someone else for your basic needs: food, shelter, clothing, or even love (you love yourself even if you don't have friends, family, or a significant other to love you.) Therefore, being self-sufficient is not a bad state to be in at all. Rather, I see it as a desirable state. On the other hand, I do see your point that greed and possessiveness are blocks to social progress and environmental sustainability. Unlike self-sufficiency, greed and possessiveness aren't a means of personal responsibility, but rather personal superiority. Cathy Evan,

I respectfully disagree with your definition of self-sufficientcy. I believe self-sufficiency means you don’t need to be a burden to others. In the work place this means you don’t have to constantly be told what to do, and managers know you can do your work with out being watched all the time.

In terms of finances, this means you have sufficient income not to need government assistance, the good nature of friends and family, or extensive loans.

In your personal life this means you have an identity that makes you secure with your own self. You don’t need the input of others to make you feel good; it helps, but it’s not a requirement.

I see self sufficiency as self confidence and the ability to take care of yourself without “mooching” off of someone else. This doesn’t mean at all that you don’t “need to relate to anyone else,” but that you don’t need to *rely* on someone else for your basic needs: food, shelter, clothing, or even love (you love yourself even if you don’t have friends, family, or a significant other to love you.)

Therefore, being self-sufficient is not a bad state to be in at all. Rather, I see it as a desirable state.

On the other hand, I do see your point that greed and possessiveness are blocks to social progress and environmental sustainability. Unlike self-sufficiency, greed and possessiveness aren’t a means of personal responsibility, but rather personal superiority.

Cathy

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