I have a couple of friends who always seem to be processing the same issue at the same time. It may be intimacy or friendship or establishing an income. The issues have been quite varied.

This happens even if they haven’t been in touch much in the time in between. They are around the same, different genders. They have similar interests but quite different values on some things.

These are the only two people who I know this happens to. I’m just wondering if anyone else has this experience for themselves or if you know other people like this.

Let me know in the comments if you do. I’d be fascinated to hear.

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8 Comments to “Weird Connections”

  1. If they are around the same stage or age in their lives, then it would be natural to be dealing with these issues. At the age I am, many are going back to their previous careers or thinking about changing fields or going back to school.

  2. Barbara says:

    Hi Evan

    I think I understand how specific this processing is happenning between your friends. Almost eerie, right? Similar to sychronicities that seem almost impossible. Kinda like the hundredth monkey on the other side of the world phenomenon.

    However, I had to smile. If you’ve ever been involved in a 12 step group, processing the same things at the same time and often at a continuing equal pace, with people one doesn’t really know but has a certain camaraderie and commonality in choosing to attend the meetings, finding one has been doing the same thing as another while apart, can be an everyday/every week occurrence! I presume it may work in similar fashion in any sort of recovery, self-help or support group. If I had to guess why it happens, part of the recovery premise is doing it together. So even though I have only one friend in the group I attend, all of us are all doing the same type of work based on like, and at the same time, totally different experience. I guess no matter the experience, the outcomes seem universal.

    So, yes, at each 12 step meeting, I find myself realizing I’m processing the same things as the person sitting next to me, even if it is a different person each week. As a rule, the only time I see these people is in this group setting, no additional contact to know what’s going on in their world.

    I think what seems most weird to me now is not what, but how many people there are dealing with what I’m dealing with, which I’ve always perceived as a lot of strange stuff. But I’ve learned otherwise, as I’ve heard what I felt was ‘weirder’, all the time…

  3. Evan says:

    Hi Barbara, yes it does seem impossible. I understand how a group working through the same stuff can be helpful, and that people will be working the same stuff in the group. Thanks for your comment.

  4. Evan says:

    Hi ClinicallyClueless, it’s the timing that I find so weird. Thanks for your comment. I think this may be your first comment here; welcome.

  5. Walter says:

    In my experience I only see those instances on people who are intimate with one another. It’s very fascinating though how such a thing happens between two different people. Could it be that their intuition is on the same wave length? :-)

  6. Evan says:

    Hi Walter, yes I guess that could be it. I think this is your first comment here so thanks for the comment and welcome to the blog.

  7. Mark says:

    I have seen this happen numerous times over the years, however the people usually are tied to each other in some obvious way. It is interesting that you are the common denominator in this case.

  8. Evan says:

    Hi Mark, I hadn’t thought about me being the common denominator. Thanks for your comment.

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